Here is a post from a homeschool mom and my response:
Subject: [waldorfhomeeducators] a question on computer games
Hello,
Now here is a topic which will undoubtedly bring out all kinds of> stances. I am not asking if video games are good or bad (I don't think they are inherently evil), nor am I asking> what policy I should have. I do let my kids play some games on the computer but I control the amount of time they spend> playing them. 1 hour on weekends of minecraft, and a 1/2 hour reading program each day mid-week. My> question goes to those of you who do allow some computer games at home, what have some of you done about games that brought out competition and "agression" in your kids?> >> > My 11 yr old boy is really interested in minecraft and some friends of his> have introduced him to minecraft Hunger Games. We haven't read the> book nor watched the movie (my kids are still too young 8 and 11) we> know all about it cause a few of my kids' friends have watched it (in our community my children are the only kids I know who don't have wide access to screen entertainment). Now those children have told my sons about how exciting it is to play hunger games on minecraft. So I> checked it out on youtube and google and frankly I find the premise> repulsive. I know there are lots of servers who offer the game but on the> first link I read I found a server who defined the games' objectives as "be> the last man/woman standing" and "expect a bloodbath", etc.> >> > If any of you know minecraft, it is not a violent "looking" game, things don't look like bomb scenes after they fall apart, they look like broken legos.
1-But in all conscience, I can't condone this kind of "game" for my kid.
2- But I also,> know that playing mildly or even full-on violent video games does not> make kids into psychopathic serial killers. Boys are> somehow moredrawn to these kinds of games and it doesn't make them bad,> it's just the way they are wired.
3- But given the amount of daily bloodshed> throughout the world and out of respect for victims of violent deaths I just don't like my 11 yr old boy playing this> particular version of the game, or any kind of game that involves the> violent elimination of an opponent.> >> > My kid feels like the most oppressed child in the world (he isn't, his> parents love him and care for him, we do our best and strive to do even> better). I have explained kindly but firmly that I just don't believe> people should "play murder", just like I suppose a vegan family does not> believe animals should be exploited for human use or a religious family> does not believe their God or Gods should be taken lightly. As David H.> Albert said in one of his homeschooling books, we wouldn't allow kids to> "play rape" or "play genocide", why is"playing murder" so different?
I sent this email to an unschoolers group and I got a few responses in favor of the game and kind of a fear based response that boys are competitive and agressive by nature so video games are a safe and controlled way to help them let off steam, if I don't let him play that game he will try to get that competitive/agressive urge satisfied elsewhere. This response made me a little wishy washy for a while, I don't want this to become a power struggle between us, but for now I am "sticking to my guns" no pun intended :-) and will not allow that version of minecraft or any other game of that style. I explained it to my son's friend, a 12 year old, who told me I shouldn't be worried about the boys playing the game because they can tell the difference between real life violence and violence on a screen. ay, ay, ay.
> Does anyone who has gone through this with boys have a suggestion, an experience to share, wisdom?
> >> > thanks, kat
My response:
I have 9 and 11 year old boys and so I totally understand this situation!!
1. When in doubt, go with your gut feeling. As a mother, you know what is best for your child. It's better to err on the safe side. Anyways, computer games are a privilege, not a right. If I ever feel video games are being destructive in any way (fighting about it, getting in the way of doing what needs to be done, going over allotted time, etc etc) then I have a "no video game" time period for a while, because it is a privilege not a right.
2. You may try this: Tell him that he probably feels "oppressed" because you are making the decision for him. Tell him that you are going to let him make this decision because you feel he is ready to start making some of his own decisions based on what his conscience and moral standards are, and that he needs to decide what his values and moral standards are. This will be the first of many decisions he will have to make in his life about his values, and it is good to know before the situation arises what his values are. BUT, that he needs to make that decision informatively, and so you want to talk to him about it first, and so he can decide what he wants his values to be.
Then, I would talk to him about "group mentality". Tell him about Hitler and about how social scientists are still studying the group mentality behind it- how could so many people think that this was ok. Tell him about slavery, and that people had slaves "because everyone else did" and that they tried to justify slavery and how "justifying" something that is immoral is still immoral- and that it blocks you from knowing (and doing) the truth. And that in Massachusetts in colonial times, people thought that others who were not of their religious faith should be persecuted, and even killed. But that there were people like Anne Hutchinson, and Roger Williams who started the Rhode Island colony, and others who rose above the "group mentality" and dared to think differently than what everyone else thought, and even speak up for what they thought was right, even though it led to both Anne Hutchinson and Roger Williams being cast out. But now they are in the history books as heroes. (It helps to tell the stories of these people, really playing up the hero part)
Now "everyone" thinks that the Hunger Games are "ok" and that playing a minecraft Hunger Game is ok "because kids can tell the difference between real life violence and violence on a screen". Then I would say what you said: we wouldn't allow kids to "play rape" or "play genocide", why is"playing murder" so different? If you play rape, you still know the difference between rape in real life and rape on a screen, right? The problem is in the principle.
It may seem like "everyone" thinks that the Minecraft Hunger Games are ok, but making a decision based on group mentality (everyone else is doing it, so it must be ok) is very dangerous.
Also, and here's my own thoughts on Hunger Games, that the author was trying to show the group mentality principle in the people (in the book/movie) who watched the Hunger Games. If people stopped watching the Hunger Games, the Hunger Games would end. But no one stopped to think about how the Hunger Games effected the people in them, or their families, or their villages. And that the people had not only become callused to violence, they loved it! And I think that in reality, a lot of people are not only totally missing that point, but becoming no better than those people in the book/movie who watched the Hunger Games, by making things like Hunger Game Minecraft! I think we have become so callused in our culture from watching such violent movies and playing violent video games that we have become like those people in the Hunger Games- mindless and immune to the effects of violence in a culture. I cringe when I hear people say how much they love the Hunger Games movie, that they've watched it tons of times, on and on. My husband read the book and we (unfortunately and against my better judgment) watched the movie. My husband read the book and got the message I talked about before, but also about a message about war- that maybe she was also trying to say that sending our young 19 year old troops off to war to kill other young troops, is a lot like the Hunger Games. I was traumatized by the violence in the movie- and I'm so shocked that people let CHILDREN watch that movie. The violence was disgusting, so I'm not sure why people say they want to see it over and over- just like the people in the storyline who watch the Hunger Games. Was the author trying to say that we have become a culture callused, and even violent loving, and instead of getting that message, everyone has gotten really into the violence of the book/movie??
One of the reasons I homeschool my children is to get them to think above the group mentality- to think about what is right, even if it is not what "everyone else" thinks, and to question, and to use their brains and to speak out and stand up, like the heroes in history who stood up for slavery, and were against religious intolerance, and those few who stood up against Hitler's genocide.
